You Gotta be kidden!
by Black kitiye
Summary: Kakashi started a show called, 'Things you didn't know show' thus, creating utter chaos! Will the Naruto characters's secrets be safe? Kakashi, I highly doubt it!
1. Chapter 1

**You Gotta be kidden'!**

DISCLAIMER: no I don't own Naruto...or Gaara...or the dark realm...or ramen...orrr, wait, that's all!

Quote-"Darkness!"

Thought-'Darkness!'

Kyuubi- '** stupid kit...'**

**Naruto: hey! I heard that!**

**Kyuubi: what? **

**Naruto: you know that we share the same brain you know?**

**Kyuubi: you mean my brain, since you don't have one to share!**

**B-kitiye: ouch! (Grabs a cup of ramen and enjoys the show)**

**Naruto: GRRRR! I'LL KILL YOU!**

**Kyuubi: you really are stupid, what part of _we share the same body_ you don't understand?**

**Naruto: (chokes himself)**

**Kyuubi: (takes over Naruto's body before he does more damage to himself)**

**B-kitiye: what? The show's over?**

**Kyuubi: just shut up and start this stupid story!**

**B-kitiye: fine...here's chappy #1 ooooof You Gotta be kidden'! **

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The lights turned on, Hinata and Kiba prepared the two cameras, and the new talk show, 'Things you didn't know show!' was ready to go!

"Oi, Hinata, Kiba, you two ready?"

"Yes, Kakashi-sensei!"

"Sir, yes, sir."

"Arf!"

"Kiba, what did I say about Akamaru?"

"but, but... he's the only one who can work the light!" Kakashi looked at Akamaru in the control room with Shino.

"What about Shino?"

"Akamaru's assistant."

"Wait, so Akamaru is the only one who can work the lights, sound, carmitshal thingys, and the phone calls?"

"Uhhh, ya... b-but Shino awnsers the phone calls!" Kakashi looks back at the two, and Akamaru and Shino both merrily waved to Kakashi.

"Don't we have other workers?"

"Not really..."

"T-the crew is just us... you, Kiba, Akamaru, Shino, and I..."

"Sad..."

"Arf, arf!"

"What did he say?"

"We're on five!"

"Ok, places everyone!" sighed Kakashi. Akamaru winked at Kiba, and gave Shino a high five.

"Congrats, Akamaru."

"Hello! And welcome tooo, the 'Things you didn't know show!' today, we have three special guests, Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto!"

(Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke enters room)

"Hi Kakashi-sensei!"

"Hello Naruto, please, take a seat!"

"This is stupid and pointless."

"Sasuke!"

"Stop being such a prick!"

"Only if you stop being a idiotic dobe."

"GRRR! SASUKE!!!!"

"Anyways... this is team seven! They're chunnin, and they had many, many, interesting missions! Why don't you tell us about your 'missions'?

"Right! Well, before we became Chunnin, our very first and dangerous mission, was to protect a bridge builder, from the infamous Zabuza! And Haku!!!"

"Sure..."

"Believe it!"

"Really? So, tell me more about your selves."

"Hmm? Oh, I'm Naruto Uzumaki! I like ramen and one day, I will become Hokage!"

"I'm Sakura, And I like..." Sakura cutely tilted her head, as she thought about what she likes...since Sasuke is out of the picture, "pink stuff..."

"My name is Sasuke Uchiha, I'm a avenger. That's all you need to know."

"Uh-huh, " Kakashi boredly looked at his Flash cards and sighed. "So, how much do you like your team mates?"

"Uhhhh"

"What kind of question is that?!"

"I was just simply asking if you get along well?"

"Oh, well, let me start, Sasuke is ok, though a little cold-hearted, and Naruto is annoying as hell!"

"Wha?"

"Hmm, that's nice, how bout you Naruto?"

"Grrrr! Hm? Oh, well, Sakura is really scary when she's mad, so I can really say anything about her when she's present...and Sasuke, well he's and asshole! He's such a bastard!"

"Interesting...how bout you Sasuke?"

"I hate them both."

"Is that all? What about Naruto? I thought he was your lover?" Kakashi smirked under his mask.

"Lover?" asked Sakura.

"LOVER!?!" screamed Naruto.

"What are you implying, Kakashi? I'm an Uchiha. I am not gay, and even if I was, I wouldn't even dream to be with him!"

"SAME GOES FOR ME! I'm not gay! I like girls! And I hate that stupid Uchiha!"

"Hmm, I see, so, it looks like the couple are having problems..."

"WE WEREN'T EVEN TOGETHER IN THE FIRST PLACE!"

"Rigggght. So, would you mind explaining me why were you two making out in the forest?"

"Wh-what are you talking about?" shuddered Sasuke.

"I have it on tape!"

"WHAAAT!" shouted Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, Kiba, Hinata, and Shino.

"Ok Akamaru! Role on the tape!"

(In the control room)

Akamaru got the tape and played it so everyone In whole world could see it.

"You already knew about this the whole time didn't you?" said Shino.

"Arf."

"Did you tell Kiba?"

"Arf."

"...you're evil. I respect that."

"Arf!"

(The clip thingy that everyone's looking at)

In the forest, Naruto is just leaning near a tree, deep in thought. Out of nowhere, Sasuke appears. Naruto walked up to Sasuke to say...

"Sasuke! What are you doing here you bastard!"

"What? Do I need a reason for me to fuck that tight ass of yours?"

"W-what?" Naruto gasped, "I-I thought you liked Sakura!"

"Ha! Don't make me laugh! You know I hate Sakura!"

"Oh..." Naruto blushed. Cautiously, Naruto decided to back up a little.

"What's the matter Naruto? Why do you look scared?" Sasuke followed Naruto as he back up into a tree.

"Hmm? I don't know what you're saying bastard! I just wanted tooo...I just wanted to lean on this tree!" laughed nervously as he patted the tree behind him.

"Oh, really?" before Naruto could run away, Sasuke caught him by the arm and swung Naruto back to the tree and pinned both his hands above his head. "Why in such a rush? I thought we could just hang out, or at least talk."

"Ha, ha ha...sure l-let's just talk! Sooo, what do you want to talk about? How bout ramen! Ya! Let's just go to a ramen restaurant and we'll just sit and talk, and eat! You know! And, and you know I'm very hungry..." the poor Naruto got interrupted by Sasuke's evil tongue, that intruded Naruto's mouth. The blond boy, after taking everything in to comprehend the situation he's gotten into, returned the kiss as passionately as he could manage.

Naruto noticed that he felt feverish, and somehow his blurry vision made the trees and everything else spin. Naruto got scared by this new feeling and tried to push away. "Sasuke, please stop! W-what if someone sees us?"

"Well, let them see! Naruto, what are you scared of? You know that nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm here."

"I know..." Naruto sighed. Sasuke kissed Naruto again as the screen faded. And the camera went back to Kakashi.

"And what do about that Sasuuuuke?"

"Nh." Naruto blushed and covered his face.

"OH MY GWAD!" Sakura shouted. "Why? Naruto?...why?" she whispered.

"Sakura I'm sooooo sorry!" Naruto cried behind his hands.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner? Dammit Naruto, can't you see that I'm a yaoi fan?" Naruto slowly uncovered his face.

"Oh, ... he he he! Sorry, I thought that you'll kill me if you'd find out... cuz you have a crush on Sasuke..."

"Don't worry about that, I thought so too, until I found out that I'm a lesbian."

"Wha?" gasped Kakashi, Sasuke, Naruto, Hinata, Akamaru, and Shino. Kiba wasn't surprised

"Hmm? You guys didn't know? Well it's kinda obvious."

**(Somewhere in Ino's house...) **

"YATTA!" Ino squealed, "Sakura, you will be mine!!!!"

**(And back to the show...)**

"Ok... well anyways, Naruto, I have a question for you."

"Y-yes?"

"Do you really love sasuke?"

"Uhhh...YES! BELIEVE IT!"

"Then why are you cheating on him for Neji?"

"Neji?!" Naruto gasped.

"WHAT?" Sasuke growled. "What the fuck are you doing with that sick bastard?" he glared at Naruto.

"Ummm, umm, I don't knowwww!" Naruto cried.

"Well it look like you know what you're doing! NARUTO, I AM NOT GOING TO ASK YOU AGAIN, WHY DID YOU BETRAY ME?"

"I...can't tell you!" Naruto choked between sobs. He hid his face with his hand again.

"Well, speaking of Neji, here he is!"

(Neji enters room)

"Hello Kakashi..."

"I'LL KILL YOU!" yelled Sasuke as he jumped out of his seat so he could strangle Neji.

"SECURITY!" Suddenly out of nowhere, sand separated the two young ninja.

"Uh, thank you Gaara..."

Gaara nodded. Shino got a really big piece of paper that said, ' I thought you might need a security guard, so I called Garra.'

Kakashi nodded, and said, " so, did you know that Naruto was with Sasuke?"

"Yes."

"You bastard!"

"Shush, anyways, why did you interfere with their relationship?"

"Because, Naruto belongs to me."

"SAY WHAT?"

Neji smirked at Sasuke, "Naruto really didn't love Sasuke, he deserves better then that useless bag of crap." Gaara tried to keep Sasuke in his chair, and strangle Neji, even though he really deserved it.

"Is this true Naruto?" Sasuke managed to ask.

"I...can't say...not now..." Sasuke looked away, he heard enough.

"Don't worry Naruto, Neji can't hurt you wile we're here, I know what he did to you, but if you're too scared to speak, it's ok."

"I love Sasuke!" Naruto whispered. Sasuke looked up to Kakashi, "What. Did . He. Do. To. My. NARUTO?" Sasuke growled.

"You really want to know what really happened between Naruto and Neji?"

"YES DAMMIT!"

"Well, cool down, Akamaru, show role the tape!"

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**To the readers:**

Well, ya, here's my story so far... I hope you liked it, and if you didn't I'm sorry. Next chappy, you'll see why Naruto is frightened by Neji, why Akamaru is really working for Kakashi, Kiba's worst fear, and if Ino will attempt to kidnap Sakura or not!!!!!!!!!! please R&R!!!


	2. Chapter 2

**You Gotta be kidden'!** Ch.2

DISCLAIMER: no I don't own Naruto... or my freedom...

Quote-"Darkness!"

Thought-'Darkness!'

Kyuubi- '** stupid kit...'**

**Naruto: Oi! I'm not stupid!**

**Kyuubi: Ok, ok, I admit, you're not stupid at all kit, and I'm sorry, what I meant to say, is that you just nothing but a mental (1) impairment boy.**

**Naruto: that's right!**

**B-kitiye: Woa, he's good.**

**Naruto: Ya, he is a good demon-fox isn't he?**

**Kyuubi: ...Hey, won't I make an appearance in this sad excuse for a story?**

**B-kitiye: I don't know...do you have and appointment?**

**Kyuubi: FOR WHAT?**

**B-kitiye: you know, to get in my story?**

**Kyuubi: I bet no one else got an appointment with you.**

**B-kitiye: actually, everyone did. Even bushy-brows. That's why he made it in my story.**

**Naruto: Why didn't I get an appointment!**

**B-kitiye and Kyubbi: Cuz your forced to.**

**Naruto: so I don't have a say in which story I'm going to be in?**

**B-kitiye: No.**

**Kyuubi: Well get reading folks, I have to get these bloody papers filled...enjoy.**

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**(Last time:)**

_Neji smirked at Sasuke, "Naruto really didn't love Sasuke, he deserves better then that useless bag of crap." Gaara tried to keep Sasuke in his chair to keep him from strangling Neji, even though he really deserved it._

"_Is this true Naruto?" Sasuke managed to ask._

"_I...can't say...not now..." Sasuke looked away, he heard enough._

"_Don't worry Naruto, Neji can't hurt you wile we're here, I know what he did to you, but if you're too scared to speak, it's ok."_

"_I love Sasuke!" Naruto whispered. Sasuke looked up to Kakashi, "What. Did . He. Do. To. My. NARUTO?" Sasuke growled._

"_You really want to know what really happened between Naruto and Neji?"_

"_YES DAMMIT!" _

"_Well, cool down, Akamaru, show the clip!"_

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"Arf, arf..."

"What's that Akamaru? Oh, right, Sasuke and others watching this show, we'll be right back after a short break!"

(Cameras off.)

"WHAT!"

"Sasuke...shush."

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(Meanwhile, out side of the studio...)

"Don't worry my dear Sakura, I'll get you out of here!" she said as she used her chakra to climb the brick wall.

"NOT SO FAST INO!"

"Well, hello...Lee. What brings you here?"

"I should be asking the same question to you Ino..."

"Oh, well if you must know, I'm going to save my beloved Sakura, from the evil clutches of Kakashi sensei!"

"Oh really?" Lee unwrapped his bandages and whipped and pulled Ino to the ground. "Forget it Ino, she's mine!"

"Didn't you see the T.v just a few minutes ago? She's a lez!"

"She is? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lee fell in his knees and sobbed.

"There, um, there Lee, I'm sure there's a whole lot of... pinked haired girls waiting for you to hit on them!"

"No! She's the only one pink haired, blue eyed, selfish whore, that I love! And my love can overcome any obstacle! I will at least make her bi!"

"Well, that makes us both! And you'll never make her bi! Not at my watch you don't!" she growled.

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(Inside the studio)

"Annnd welcome back to the ' 'Things you didn't know show!'"

"Grrr" Sasuke said as he slowly steams into unspeakable rage and anger. Kakashi noticed the daggers which were supposed to be normal glaring eyes...but cautiously, Kakashi, tried to get to the point as fast as possible.

"A-Akamaru? Get the tape! Hurry!" he laughed nervously. Akamaru tripped and showed the tape.

(In the forest)

A blond haired boy limped and leaned on a tree. You could tell that he's been training all day. So far it's been three years that Sasuke left the village hidden in the leaves.

"Sasuke..." Naruto whispered as a tear rolled down his cheek.

"Naruto?" Naruto turned around.

"Oh, ...Hi Neji! What brings you here?" he said with a fake smile.

" I just wanted to take a walk in the woods..."

" to um, clear you head and stuff like that?" Naruto asked.

"No, just wanted to get away from all the noise, Naruto, you don't look so well. Is something bothering you?"

"WHA? NO! OF COURSE NOT! WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT?" Naruto asked waving his arms around spazzing.

"Uh huh..." he raised his eyebrow, " you know that I know that I can see through that fake smile of yours."

"Huh? Y-you can?" Naruto asked. Neji just looked at him. 'It's kinda obvious...' he thought. If you were standing in Neji's place, or watching the clip that's showing in the telly, you would see Naruto's stained face, runny nose, red face, and big blue eyes that showed sorrow and despair, annnnd looked extremely cute all together...you might actually think something's bothering him.

"I was just guessing..." he lied. Naruto blushed and laughed, naturally and said, "no worries, I'll be ok. I just want to be alone...if you don't mind!"

"What if I do?"

"...why would you? I..you don't even...know me that well!"

"What makes you think I don't?"

"Huh?" he tilted his head.

"...I'll not leaving until you tell me what happened." He walked over Naruto and pinned him on the floor straddling his waist.

"N-Neji?"

"Usually you run away when someone tries to talk to you about your personal life, or your emotions."

"And you're on me why?"

"So you won't run away."

"Ah."

"Now talk."

"What if I don't want to?"

"I have plenty of free time on my hands."

"So do I"

"I'm a minor so there's no reason for me to leave."

"Same here."

"I ate."

"...ramen?"

"No..."

"...but I didn't eat breakfast! What if I starve? Don't you care?"

"...such a difficult question."

"Grrr are you serious!" He glared at Neji and tried to push him off, but Neji got his wrists and placed them over his head.

"It's Sasuke isn't it? That's why you were crying!" he growled.

"Oh not this again! Yes, it's SASUKE!" Naruto said peevishly.

"Naruto, why can't you understand the fact that he not only he tried to kill you, but left you for now how many years? OH YA, three!"

"But, he came back! For me!"

"Did he say that or did you dream it?"

"No! I...didn't know what to do, he confessed his love to me...and..."

"You told him that you loved him back!" Neji said gritting his teeth.

"No...I yelled at him..." he choked.

"And?"

"I still love him...I'm going back! Neji, thanks for the talk!" he chirped happily. Naruto tried to get up and go find his beloved Sasuke but, Neji just won't let go.

"Nejiiiiii!" he wined.

"No. I won't let you go Naruto, not this time!"

"What are you talken' about Neji?"

"I love you dammit! Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"Neji...I'm sorry..."

"Why him? WHY?" he yelled. Naruto tried to look away but Neji's free hand grabbed his chin.

"Neji l-let go of me."

"Oh, sorry, you want to find your 'Sas-su-ke'!"

"Yes..."

"Well, too bad Naruto, you belong to me!" he hissed. Naruto glared. "That's right Naruto, you belong to me, your mind, your sole, your heart,...and..." Neji started to lick Naruto's neck. "Your body."

"Well sorry to break you bubble, but my mind, sole, heart, and especially my body belongs to Sasuke!"

"Then I'll make you mine!" he said as he used one hand to preform a jutsu.

"Wha...what are you doing?" he asked. Neji tapped his hand on Naruto's forehead making his whole body numb.

"What did you do? I can't move!"

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**My thanks to:**

i-am-gamer-hear-me-raor : thank you for noticing that...ya, I hate it when people do that! Thanks for reviewing!

mishka-chan : I'm glad you love it!!!! and thanks for reviewing!

Demyx Fanboy : sorry I took so long...here's the second chappy! Thanks for reviewing!

Ryou-la-lune : like I said before, I'm sorry...I hope you like the second chappy! Thanks for reviewing!

kitsunechibiko : lol, noo, man, I lose more and more reviewers that way...any who, I'm glad you liked my story, thanks for reviewing!

narutowolfgirl : ...ok! (Glues my mouth shut.) Mhhm-mhh-mm! (Thanks for reviewing!)

Kawaii-Aikurushii-Kitsune : it's soo true! I'll try to get Akamaru to speak...I mean bark up more lines and I'm glad you liked my story! Thanks for reviewing!

Luna-chan14 : WHAT EVER YOU DO, DO NOT FALL OF THE CLIFF! HOLD ON! I'll update as fast as I can!!!! thanks for reviewing though!

SAKURA : I try! And thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it!

Of Heaven and Hell : I'm sorry that I couldn't update this story as fast...but I'm glad you liked my story! And here's another 'amazing' chappy! Thanks for reviewing!

Afrochicken14-NFFR : uhh oops! Sorry! ...is there ramen in your party? Thanks for reviewing though!

IloveDaisukeNiwa : I'm glad you luv my story! Updated and done! Thanks for reviewing!

Tesina Gela Gardner : no worrys! I know how you feel! Thanks for reviewing!

Miyavi Fangirl : here it is! (Dusts the old tape) wait...it says 'property of Sasuke Uchiha'...omg! It's porn!!! and Naruto is in it! My eyes! Anywaaaays, thanks for reviewing!

Meowzers & Wh00t : ya you gots a point there! Thanks for the cookies! Are they special cookies? Lol, anyways, thanks for reviewing!

cute.red.Bunny-chan : I'm glad you liked my story, but sorry I couldn't update soon. Thanks for reveiwing!

**To my readers:**

Whoooo! So many reviews! Well, like I've said before to others, I'm sorry that I couldn't update sooner...I waz grounded...it sucked...but now, I think I can update a little faster! Anyways, who will win Sakura's heart? Ino or Lee? What's going happen to Naruto when Neji's pissed, and eyes covered in lust and jell-O? Err, did I say jell-O? What I meant to say jealousy! Cha! We'll all find out in the next chappy offfff, 'You Gotta be kidden!'


	3. Chapter 3

**You Gotta be kidden'!** Ch.3

DISCLAIMER: no I don't own Naruto... or my freedom...

Quote-"Darkness!"

Thought-'Darkness!'

Kyuubi- '** stupid kit...'**

**B-kitiye: are you done yet?**

**Kyuubi: ...this is stupid.**

**Naruto: can you at least change what you say up there? You even said I'm not stupid last chapter!**

**Kyuubi: ...sorry kit what done is done.**

**Naruto: (pouts)**

**B-kitiye: well I'm glad you finished your papers, and now I'll see what I can do with them!**

**Kyuubi: you don't know what your doing don't you?**

**B-kitiye: I'M MAKING UP ALONG THE WAY!!!!!**

**Naruto: ...ok, well j-just enjoy this chapter ok...(runs away)**

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"_Then I'll make you mine!" he said as he used one hand to preform a jutsu. _

"_Wha...what are you doing?" he asked. Neji tapped his hand on Naruto's forehead making his whole body numb._

"_What did you do? I can't move!"_

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"Good." Neji smirked.

"Neji let me go!" Neji chuckled and started to undress Naruto. "Ne-Neji? Wait...please!" Naruto begged. Neji rubbed where Naruto's heart supposed to be.

"With this jutsu, I'll make sure you'll be mine! And if you betray me any way, well, I'll know and when I find you... and I'll punish you." he smiled sweetly and purple chakra covered his hand like a flame. Then he grabbed where he rubbed.

"AHHHHH!" Naruto shrieked.

'**Oi kit! What happened? Why is that girl hurting you?'**

'First of...all, he's not a girl...'

'**Ah. Well that still doesn't explain why he's taking those ballet lessons.' **the fox murmured. Naruto winced and so did the demon fox. Kyuubi didn't feel pain since the forth hokage sealed him in side Naruto, which caused him to panic, and let his chakra to flow too fast for Naruto can control.

"There, there Naruto. It's just a jutsu, the pain will leave soon." he said as he stroke Naruto's blond hair. When Naruto opened his eyes, they blood red, surrounded by black.

"**Let me kill the bastard! KILL!" **Growled Kyuubi.

"You...you're not Naruto!" Neji got off him. Kyuubi tried to stand up, but luckly for Neji, his jutsu was too powerful. (AN: weird huh? Maybe Kyuubi just goten' weaker and older!)

"**What did you do?" **Naruto/Kyuubi said, as their mouth Fomes from the pain in their chest.

"...I used the Koi-Hitoya jutsu on him, painful at first but quite rewarding at the end." he smirked.

'Kyuubi...don't kill him...'

'**...kit I know you pity him but he WENT TOO FAR! He's going to hurt you, and I can't heal you!' **

'Kyubbi...I'll be fine... I didn't know you cared! You softy you!' Naruto smirked inwardly.

'**Naruto?'**

'Yes Kyu-kun?'

'**Shut the hell up'**

'You know it's bad if you bottle up your true feeling you know!'

'**My dear kitsune, you mustn't worry about my being, but lets try to focus the chakra on your legs so you can run as hell, thus leaving Neji in heat.'**

'Good idea!' with the rest on Naruto's will and energy he had left in his body, he focused his chakra. Naruto got up from the floor and attempted to walk away from Neji, but...

"Stop." Neji commanded. Naruto obeyed. His eyes turned back from red to a dull blue.

'**Kit? Oi kit! What are you doing?'**

'I don't know...oh ya! Keep on walken' away!' Naruto continued to walk.

'**That's right kit!'**

Neji grabbed Naruto, "I said stop!" Naruto and Kyuubi felt the sharp pain in his chest. "See? What did I tell you? Betray me, and I'll punish you!" Naruto fell back to the ground.

"Neji... even if you punish me, rape me... I will always love...Sasuke..." Neji glared at him.

"Well I guess I have to take care of that too..." he sneered as he took off Naruto's boxers, "but first...I have to take care of this."

(End of tape)

Everyone who watched this tape except Kakashi and Akamaru was dumbstruck.

"Naruto...why didn't you tell me?" Sasuke asked.

"I was scared...I'm so sorry Sasuke..."

"Don't be! The only one who should be sorry is Neji!" Sasuke leaped once more at Neji so he can kill him. Sasuke punched a really good one right on Neji's eye. Then Gaara grabbed Sasuke and put him back on his seat.

"Sorry Kakashi, he kinda... slipped right through my hands." Gaara smiled.

"Thanks Gaara." Sasuke whispered.

"Neji, Neji, Neji...what are we going to do with you?" Kakashi said disappointedly, "oh, I know how about releasing the curse you left in Naruto? Hmm? How bout it?"

"It's not that simple you know..." he chuckled.

"I'm not asking if you if it's simple or not, I'm telling you to release him!"

"That's just it, Naruto has to submit to me. Then the curse is lifted...but he's just to stubborn." he smiled.

"NO WAY IN HELL I'M SUBMITTING TO YOU!" Naruto bellowed. Sasuke glared at Neji.

"You just had to use _that_ jutsu!"

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(Meanwhile...somewhere in the studio...)

"Just give up Lee!" she panted.

"No! Neva!" He said dramatically.

"Gahhh, don't have time for this!" Ino walked up to Lee and quickly placed her thumb on the back of Lee's neck causing him to faint.

"Thank you television!" she said. She continued until she heard Naruto's voice.

"NO WAY IN HELL I'M SUBMITTING TO YOU!"

"You just had to use _that_ jutsu!" Ino peeped her head in and Kakashi felt her presents.

"Well sorry folks! But that's all the time we have today! Till next time onnnn, 'The things you didn't know show'!" the lights dimmed, Hinata and Kiba turned off their cameras, and Shino and Akamaru shut down for the night.

"Neji, I want you to report to the hokage immediately, I'll see you there shortly." Neji nodded and left the building. Sasuke got up and hugged Naruto.

"I'm sorry..." Naruto whispered.

"Didn't you hear me? Don't be...Naruto, _I'm_ sorry...for yelling at you like that..." he kissed his kitsune on the forehead. "God, I love you so much Naruto!" Naruto sobbed in Sasuke's chest knowing that his nightmare will soon end.

"That's right Naruto...let it all out."

"Kakashi..." Sakura glared.

"Yes Sakura?" he said with a sweat drop.

"Who was filming all this?"

"I was..."

"You were...YOU WERE! AND YOU KNEW AND YOU COULD HAVE STOPPED NEJI FROM GIVING NARUTO THAT CURSE!" Sakura said with her pissed off tone.

"I could have."

"BUT YOU DIDN'T WHY?" This time the spotlight is on Kakashi, everyone held their breath and awaited his answer.

"Akamaru, did you know?"

"Arf..." he whimpered.

"... I see. Guess he doesn't tell you everything..."

"Well? Kakashi?"

"He..."

"He put another curse on Kakashi-sensei." Naruto said.

"That's right... until Naruto's curse is lifted we can be free..."

"Oh...wait, how...when did Neji put the curse on you?"

"The same day Naruto did...he caught me spying on him, but luckily I saved the tape! Now everyone will know what that bastard did to Naruto!" Kakashi gloated.

"So what now Kakashi?" Sasuke asked, "Neji's at the hokage at the moment, I hope, but... Naruto, what of him?"

"Sorry Naruto...but, you have to take one for us all..." he said sadly.

"Why me? I don't want to...I don't want him t-touching..." Naruto shook at the thought, as Sasuke held him tighter.

"I'm sorry Naruto... just think of it as the very last day that you're under Neji's control." Ino said.

"INO PIG! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!" Sakura said bluntly.

"Well, at first, I just wanted to kidnap you Sakura... but now's not the moment...Naruto don't worry, you'll be just fine! After all this and the curse is lifted, we all will take good care of you!"

"I...I know, but I just can't help feeling that he'll take me... he'll take me and I'll never see you guys..." he said softly.

"Like Ino said, we'll protect you..." Gaara said suddenly, which made every one jump because they thought Gaara went home.

"Ya, now, if you excuse Naruto and I... we've got an appointment with the hokage... and we're running late...oh well, she should be used to me being late so I hope she wont be too mad." Kakashi smiled and grabbed Naruto and poofed out of the building. Sasuke was just standing there.

"Ummm, S-Sasuke-kun?" Hinata asked.

"What does Naruto have to do with Neji again?" Kiba smirked, "oh nothing much... he has to 'submit' and let Neji be on top, if you catch my drift!" Sasuke looked at Kiba with piercing red eyes.

"Hey Kiba, you wouldn't mind if I take all my rage and anger out on you right? I mean, we are buddies! Or am I wrong?"

"Nonononononono! Wait I mean yes! We are buddies! But-but-but...!!!"

"I guess we are" Sasuke said laughing maniacally. With that, every one left the room for the two boys to 'spar' or 'kill each other'... or what ever suits this situation at the moment.

(Outside the studio)

"I guess we have to wait till tomorrow." Sakura sighed.

"Don' t worry Naruto's with Kakashi...and Baachan or the hokage, or what ever Naruto calls her!"

"Right... so Ino...why did you want to kidnap me?" Sakura blushed.

"NOT SO FAST INO!" Someone yelled behind them.

"Lee? Rock Lee, what are you doing here?"

"I'm here for you my love!" Sakura twiched.

"BACK OFF BUSHY BROWS! SAKURA IS MINE!!!!!!"

"OVER MY DEAD BODY!"

"Wait...um...you guys?"

"You know what Ino, we didn't finish our match! Last round, this one decides who will keep Sakura's heart!"

"Nononono! Wait just a–"

"FINE! IT'S ON BUSHY BROWS!"

"Wait!"

"COME ON, LET'S TAKE THIS OUTSIDE!"

"Don't I have a say in all this?"

"WE ARE OUT SIDE SMART ONE!"

"INO! LEE!" Sakura screamed. Ino and Lee just looked at her.

"Oh...uhhh, hi?" she waved.

"INO YOU ARE SO GOING DOWN!"

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**My thanks to:**

Luffy D. Monkey: oh? Maybe I should have done the summary differently... but I'm glad you liked my story! Thanks for reviewing!

Kurenai115 : I'm glad you luv it!!!!! 3rd chappy done! Hope you like! Thanks for reviewing!

shino's angel: he will soon...VERY soon... (bua ha ha ha ha!!!) Thanks for reviewing!

roboguy45 : not really a rape jutsu...BUT ok, any who, thanks for reviewing! (Poor Naruto)

JadeStoneTheYounger : glad you like my story! You wanted soon? You got soon! (Started yesterday) CHA!!!!! thanks for reviewing.

RicaZcurser : yup... funny? Indeed! I try! HAPPY NEW YEAR! ( WHOOOT WHOOOT!) Thanks for reviewing!

LoveKibaAndSinoForever : once again, I try... glad you liked it! Thanks for reviewing!

haunting hanyou : thanks... I know this story is cool! ( swelled head ) thanks for reviewing though!

**To the readers:**

Uhhh, ya, so here's the third chappy, and shtuff like that... last chappy I forgot to add one thing... oh what was it? ...oh ya!!! (chmm hmm!) clears throat,

HAPPY NEW YEARRRRRR! (WHOOT WOOO WHOOOOO!)

Ramen for all! Ok, calm, calm...the down side to all this though... school... but oh well! Anyways, for the next chappy the battle for Sakura's love begins! And what of Naruto, Kakashi, And Neji? You think this story will end right on the fourth chappy with a happy ending? OH PLEASE! There's a slight twist! Let's just say that NEJI knew that this day would come...

And let's just say that Naruto and Kakashi wasn't the only victims... but that's all I can say for now...guess you have to find out on your own, here on... 'You Gotta Be kidden!'


	4. Chapter 4

**You Gotta be kidden'!** Ch.4

DISCLAIMER: no I don't own Naruto... or my freedom...

Quote-"Darkness!"

Thought-'Darkness!'

Kyuubi- '** kits'**

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"_Ino,... Leee, just listen for once in your life!" Sakura screamed. Ino and Lee just looked at her._

"_Oh...uhhh, hi?" she waved._

"_INO YOU ARE SO GOING DOWN!"_

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"Oh it's on now!" Ino yelled.

"It's been on!" he yelled back.

"Oh gods." she said as she shook her head.

(Back to the studio...)

Sasuke felt better after that little 'spar' he had with Kiba, who was left behind unconscious on the cold floor... but any who, Sasuke got off the set and walked out a door, the hallway way was pitch dark, but that didn't bother him. As he walked he wondered if he did the right thing leaving Kiba on the floor like that...

"Whatever, he's part dog, he'll live." Sasuke said coldly. Sasuke stopped, he looked at the dark void at the end of the hall... heard someone in the shadows.

"What if the Uchiha knows of our little plan Gaara?"

"Don't worry Temari, He isn't a threat..."

Sasuke slowly crept towards the familiar voices, his sharingan helped him see clearer.

"... and speaking of puppets, we got to meet up with Kankuro, Neji, lady Hokage, and Naruto."

"Right."

Sasuke walked around the corner to face them, but they suddenly left without a trace.

"What?!" Sasuke looked around. "Gaara..." Sasuke ran out of the building.

"YOU GUYS!! Please stop! Look at you, this is so stupid! You two bird brains look like your about to kick the bucket!" Sasuke heard Sakura scream. His eye twitched.

"I DON'T CARE MY BELOVED CHERRY BLOSSOM, FOR YOU, I WOULD DIE JUST TO MAKE YOU MINE!" Lee wheezed.

"SAKURA, I know we had our fights, but I always loved you, but now, I WILL NOT LOSE TO A MONKEY LIKE HIM! MY LOVE WILL PREVAIL!" Ino gasped for air.

"What's going on here?" Sasuke interrupted.

"They're fighting for my love I guess..." Sakura sighed.

"Really? But why?" Sasuke shuddered.

"HEY WHAT DOES THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN?! I AM ATTRACTIVE YOU KNOW!"

"No, not that... why are they battling in DDR if they can just fight like normal ninjas?"

"You know I was just thinking the same thing a moment ago..." Sakura pondered.

"Personally, I would rather battle in Guitar Hero..."

"You like Guitar Hero Sasuke-Kun?" Sakura giggled.

"I don't hate it."

"Well, actually we did try battling in Guitar Hero, but we suck at it..." Ino pouted.

"I'm a expert." Sasuke said smirking.

"Well, I don't really like Guitar Hero that much, it gets boring after a while, but I like dancing." Lee smiled.

"We all noticed..." Sakura, Ino, and Sasuke all said in union.

"I wanna try Guitar Hero too!" Sakura laughed, " wanna play with me Sasuke?"

"It's on..."

"Ok, where do you wanna play?"

"WAIT A SECOND!" Sasuke panicked.

"What?" They all asked. Sasuke paused and looked around once more.

"What's a DDR station Doing out here?" Sasuke said with his arms crossed.

"I don't know... it was just near a trash can so we decided to keep it..." Lee said.

"Why would anyone want to throw this thing away?" Ino sat down next to Sakura.

"Hmm, that is a little strange..."

"Hey Sasuke, I lee, challenge you to a DDR battle!"

"Sure, but how did you get it working again? It doesn't even have a cord!"

"Hmmm, yaaa and the Tv... all this is just tooo weird.."

(** One Hour later...**)

"HA TAKE THAT SAKURA!" Sasuke gloated.

"Mehhh! No fair! I'm no expert! I have a life!" Sakura cried.

"Heeeeey! What does that suppose to mean?!"

"She is sayen' you ain't got no life boi!" Ino laughed. Sasuke glares.

"... Though it feels I'm forgetting something..."

"Hmm? What did you forget Sasuke kuuun?" Sakura asked.

"Maybe its your boy toy?" Ino grinned.

"OH MY GOD! NARUTO!" Sasuke hit himself in the head.

"Is he ok?" Lee looked worried.

"Maybe we all should check in on him." Sakura suggested.

"I'm sorry but you can't see Naruto right now." Temari jumped out of the Shadows.

"How come?" Sasuke snapped.

"Aren't we in a foul mood... well im just following the Hokage's orders." She sighed.

"Hmph. Well then, I guess I have to go talk to the Hokage then."

"The Hokage is very busy."

"It's just going to be a quick visit though."

"An order is an order Uchiha!" Temari drew out her fan. Sasuke grabbed hold of a kunai. "Must we be so persistent today?"

"Sasuke?" Sakura got her kunai as well, "what's going on?" Ino and Lee got into their fighting positions

"There's nothing going on!" She growled.

"Oh really? So what was this so called little plan you didn't want me to know?"

"Sorry but that's something I myself can't tell you..."

"And why not?!"

"Because there isn't a little plan to start with!"

"I heard all about it so don't play dumb with me!"

"No you didn't ..."

"Yes I did!"

"Are you sure because I'm pretty sure that you don't"

"GAHHH!"

"See? I told you!"

"... forget this!" Sasuke walks past Temari.

"Where are you going?" Temari asked.

"Home."

"Don't you want to see lady Hokage anymore?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Cuz you annoy me."

"That's not really a good reason... so much for being persistent." Temari scoffed.

"Sasuke? Wadda bout Naruto?" Ino said some what confused.

"I'll see him tomorrow."

"And what of this plan you heard of earlier this day Sasuke? Don't you want to know what they were plotting?" Lee asked.

"Not worth my time."

"So says the guy who's spent most of his life being an expert in Guitar Hero." Sakura said peeved.

"So?" Sasuke glared. Sasuke sighed and walked away, thinking of his next move.

"Hold it right there Uchiha, how bout I escort you to your home?" Temari said quickly.

"Whatever."

"Oh Sasuke kuuuun? Can I come too? Please!" Sakura perked up.

"But Sakuraaaa, what about me?" Ino whined.

"You can come too..." She sighed.

"And I my beloved cherry blossom?" Lee asked pouting.

"Sure."

"Yay!!" Lee and Ino jumped with glee. Suddenly Temari stabbed Sasuke on the back with a kunai. Sasuke fell on the ground and twitched.

"OH MY GWAD! SASUKE" Sakura and Ino cried, "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"

"Sorry! I thought he was a clone! Umm S-Sasuke? No hard feelings right?" Temari shuddered. Sasuke said nothing. "Oh my gwad... I killed Sasuke!"

(**MEANWHILEEEE... in the Hokage's room...**)

"So? How did you do?" She said.

"Everything is going according to plan..." Neji glared, "I have Naruto just like you've asked..."

"And?"

Neji sighed, "and... he's in a trance... everybody assumes it's me who performed the forbidden jutsu on him... and Kakashi."

"Good job my pet. And don't worry you too will be free too..." She laughed darkly. Neji looked away in shame for what he did to Naruto and Kakashi. He wished he could change his fate... but he couldn't. He wanted to believe what Naruto said, so much, but it seems hopeless.

**(ANNNNDDDDDDD back to the scene of the crime**)

"Soo what now?!" She panicked.

"That's it! We're going to see the Hokage!" Sakura growled. Temari Drew out her fan.

"Sorry, but that's not going to happen, my mission is to keep you leaf ninjas away from the Hokage and that's exactly what I'm going to do!"

"But you just killed Sasuke! And he said he was going home!"

"No, he was getting in the way of my mission! And now, you three need to be disposed of for the sake of the mission!"

"You're mad!" Before Temari was able to say otherwise, Sasuke's body turned into a dead snake.

"It... was a decoy?!" Temari gasped.

"Sasuke is alive?" Sakura grinned, "that's a relief!"

"I gotta warn–"

"Sorry Temari, but this time you're the one that's not going anywhere!" Lee lunged himself at Temari, but she blocked him with her fan.

"...Kankuro!" Temari cried.

"I'm on it!" He leaped in the action, " a little unfair don't you think? One on three? Well don't worry my puppets and I are here to even out the score!"

"Bring it!" Ino smirked, " I could use a bit of training today!"

(**At the Hokage's base**)

Sasuke quietly made his way towards the Hokage's office, 'this is strange... no security, no traps, everything's... quiet...' Sasuke though and shivered slightly. He saw light in the Hokage's office, and heard people inside. He placed his side of his face gently to the door.

"Good job my pet. And don't worry you too will be free too..."

"Naruto?" Sasuke whispered.

"I can see you outside the door... Sasuke Uchiha!" She yelled. Sasuke flinched, "you can come in.." Sasuke entered the room.

"Where's Naruto?" he said flat out to her.

"Hmm, well it's good to see you too!" She rolled her eyes, "I'm sorry he's in no condition to see anybody right now."

"What are you doing here? Where's the Hokage?" He glared, "and what are you planning to do with Naruto?"

"So inquisitive aren't we? Well, She left me in charged for today! That's why I'm here, and no I can't tell you where she went, that's classified information!"

"Right." Sasuke said with doubt.

"It's true, would I lie to you?"

"At this point I'm not that sure..."

"Don't worry bout Naruto, he's in good hands, you can see him tomorrow if you want." She waved her hand at him and Neji and Gaara opened the doors, "Good night Sasuke."

"Sorry but I'm not leaving till I see Naruto. And... what was that little plan of yours? Gaara?"

"I have no idea what your talking about Uchiha." Gaara said menacingly.

"Ha, sure you don't" Sasuke smirked. Suddenly Temari barged in the room.

"HINATA! SASUKE IS ON THE WAY HERE AND I THINK HE KNOW ABOUT THE PLAN YOU HAD WITH THE HIDDEN JUTSU AND NARUTO!" She blurted out. Hinata slapped her hand on her forehead.

"Thank you Temari! For letting us all know that!" Hinata groaned.

"Oh.. Oops..."

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**My thanks to:**

**CommGonn****: Tank uuuuu... and im sorry I took soo long! T.T and thanks for the review!**

**Sozomi:**** True true! But don't worry, he aint the bad guy... tank uu for da review! **

**Luffy D. Monkey****: lol I'm very glad you like it! (dances happy dance!) thank u for da review!**

**SilverRoseKeeper****: lol I try! And yesm there's more to come! Lol should I? Could I? Dare I? Maybe... (smirks) thanks for da review!**

**Sasuke's Baby Girl93****: lmao glad you like it! (Kiba still twitching on da ground) Thank you for reviewing!**

**Shiori dono:**** lmao!! XD XD XD im glad you like my story! (0w0) helps cleans da mess Tank u for reviewing! **

**flashley630****: OMG! Im sorrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyy (panics) umm umm umm umm... liveeeeeeeeee! tank u 4 reviewing! pouts hoping you'd review again...**

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**Kiba: you have vicious reviewers...**

**Neji: and merciless... **

**B-kitiye: yaaaaaaaa, I know... and I luv them all!**

**Sasuke: ... **

**Kiba: what's wrong Sasuke?**

**Sakuke: What did happen to Naruto?**

**Kyuubi: I don't know.**

**Neji: what are you talking about? He's your vessel!**

**Kyuubi: for your information little boy, he's my kit!**

**Kiba: awwwwwwwww**

**Sasuke: but you two should know though...**

**Neji: really? Well, I don't know... **

**Kyuubi: I got paid not to tell...**

**Sasuke: WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON!**

**Kyuubi: waaaat? Black kitiye paid me not to tell... and we had a contract...**

**Sasuke: (glares)**

**B-kitiye: Hi!**

**Sasuke: ok, you are going to tell me where's Naruto! **

**B-kitiye: what are you talken bout boi? He is right here (gets a sock puppet Naruto)**

**Naruto Sock: Hi Sasuke kuuuuuuun!**

**Sasuke: Naruto! You're ok! (huggs Naruto Sock)**

**Neji: ... Sasuke that's just a dirty sock puppet...**

**Naruto Sock: (crying)**

**Sasuke: eyes turns red DON'T TALK TO HIM THAT WAY! (hugs and kisses Naruto Sock) don't worry Naruto he didn't mean that!**

**Naruto Sock: (sniffles )**

**Kiba: Gwads Neji! What's your problem!**

**Neji: am I the only one here that's sane?**

**Kyuubi: don't worry... He'll find out eventually**

**Neji: sighs I highly doubt it...**

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**To the readers:**

I'm soooooooo sorry I wasn't able to update this story sooner... err but I do hope you like this chappy tho... but at least I have plenty of time now to work on da story sweatdrop woot woot skoo is almost ovreeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Lolz

UH huh that's right, NEJI twas framed!! poor guy... and what did happen to Naruto? What is going to happen to Sasuke when he put two and two together? Will Neji ever be free? Who will Sakura choose for her lover? Lee or Sakura? Welp, guess we gotta find out next time on, You Gotta Be Kidden! CYA soon!


End file.
